lone church spire
February 28th, 2006
I have come to the conclusion that I’m not really crazy, just mad. Yesterday I wrote something about lazy people, inconsiderate people, people who yawn their way through life and how much they all anger me. I think I got mad because they simply don’t care. They don’t have enough decency to think one way or another about how their actions influence or even hurt others. Indifference can be worse than hate in my book. Didn’t the Barenaked Ladies write a song about becoming dulled to life? Pinch Me? Something like that is happening to people around me. Pinch them.
Take my married friend. You would never know that he is married by the way he carries on with another individual. Under the guise of friendship the flirting flows freely. Under the guise of “just friends” they stand just too close, talk just too low. He’s too casual about everything. Casual and uncaring. Everyone talks about this relationship yet no one thinks of the wife at home. The wife in the dark. What about her? His indifference could kill her.
What is the lesson from all this? It’s really none of my business. In a didactic moment here’s what I have to say: I’ve been on the pedestal of self-importance before. Standing on my personal soapbox of sorrows and sins. Blah, blah, blah. Do me a favor. Pinch me. Better yet – Kick me. Kick me off my high horse if you see me in full disregard for other people’s feelings. I know I’m guilty of leaving my manners at the door from time to time. I may have my reasons. Make me make sure they make sense to both of us. I’ve made assumptions about my loved ones and exactly how much trampling they can take because they love me back. I’ve been there and done that. Again and again. “Turn my head with indifference…”